Day 1- First Things First

I, of course, had an agenda this morning but God, of course, had something else in mind. (I know you all are thinking the obvious, "Hey Jess... This is your first lesson in giving up control.") 

So anyways, my agenda for Day 1 of the 40 Day Dating Detox was to get off match.com and go through my phone and delete numbers. I was going to ease myself into this. I knew in a few days I was going to have to tackle the whole "Ghosts of Boyfriends (or random dates) Past", but that day was not going to be today. And... I was wrong.

I had to be up at 4:30 this morning because my aunt is having surgery today. So after my alarm went off and I was doing my normal "playing on my phone while trying to wake up" and saw that I had a Facebook message. And not just any Facebook message, but a message from the guy I was talking to a couple weeks ago. The guy that literally just completely quit talking to me out of the blue. The guy that made me realize that my focus and priorities are completely off kilter right now. And what does he say? (Side note: I'm not going to use anyone's names, details or anything in this blog. This will never be a means to bash anyone or hurt feelings. Obviously I will tell stories and they will be from my point of view but will be told purely for you to get to know me better and for me to figure out some things about myself.) Anyways... He said, in summary: That he knows he was a jerk. He doesn't know how to fix it. And that he doesn't want me to hold his behavior against any other guy I date in the future. Uhhhh, whoa! Apparently I'm diving head first into all this and getting closure for some things already. Craziness... 

I'm still going to get off match.com and delete some numbers today. But I'm also going to throw out my agenda for these next 40 Days and let God lead me where He wants me to go. 

Verse of the day: Isaiah 66:9 

I know God is doing some great things in my life. And I know my faith and heart are being renewed and reborn. 

Signed: I surrender.